12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
