"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
