I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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