you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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