I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize