Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
