Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
