HIV tests are more positive than that guy
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Randomize
