dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
