Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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