Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
