from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
