doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
