Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize