her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
