My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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