I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
