I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
