On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
