hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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