Cold hands, warm shart.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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