Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
