We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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