Duck Duck Cougar?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
