Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
