You're so nebulous sometimes
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
