I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
