I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
