i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
What a dumb baby whore.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
