Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just blew my weed a kiss
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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