I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize