i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
