His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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