I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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