Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
be right there i have to get my cape
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
