R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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