I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize