If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
