i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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