My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
