i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize