We won't sleep together?
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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