Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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