Screwed.edu
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
