so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
