My balls are so social today.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize