Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
