I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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