..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
We have started to decorate penises.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
