i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
