Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
